Understanding Men

His First Impression Of You & What He Wants You To Know

September 25, 2013
by Bob Grant, L.P.C.
When you first see the guy you’ve always wanted to meet, your heart starts racing. Every thought in your head starts spinning faster and faster as you wonder, “Does he even notice me?” I understand why you’re nervous. That’s why I get so many questions about how to make a great impression on a man. Let me tell you what he’s thinking so you can remind yourself when you’re feeling so nervous.
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What’s He Thinking When… He Is Upset? Something Happens?

1. What He’s Thinking Has a Lot to Do with How He’s Feeling That Specific Day

If he’s had a bad day at work or is self-conscious about something, then he isn’t going to notice you as much as he remains focused on what’s bothering him. That’s not a reflection on you, your ability to arouse a man’s passion, or anything else. It’s simply about what’s bothering him in his head.

2. You’re a Girl; Stop Trying to Prove Your Worth

I am begging you to listen to me on this one. As a woman, you already have what men find appealing. Most women (well, a lot of them) want magical dust that will make a man gaze at her with blinding passion the moment he sees her. Sorry, but if a man did that, you’d be freaked out.

Don’t focus that much on his reaction; focus on what you know. You don’t have to prove yourself as much as you need to simply be yourself. Think about how you act around guys you don’t like – pleasant, polite and I bet your guard is down.

That’s what people are trying to tell you when they say, “Be Yourself.” Or what a lot of women do is act indifferent to a man (which comes across as downright silly).

3. A Man’s Thoughts inside His Mind Are Simple

Here’s an example of how women think versus men.

The woman tastes a piece of chocolate…

“Yummmmm. Oh, this is divine and so rich. Oh, where can I get this? I’ve never tasted anything so good; I’m in heaven.”

The man tastes a piece of chocolate…

“Yummmmm. Chocolate.”

What is the moral of this example? When he sees you, he’s thinking, “Hey, it’s a girl.”

Just smile, be nice, and don’t try and force the interaction.

What He Is Thinking When He is Quiet

Then the end came, and you never saw it coming. It is the greatest fear that anyone can experience…being blindsided by something totally unexpected. So, if you’re a woman, I can understand why you want to know what’s going on inside his head.

  • Is he upset?
  • Is he thinking about leaving?
  • Is he bored?
  • Something else?

Here’s a Good Guide for You

Don’t just look at the current circumstances but focus on the previous few weeks. Have you two been fighting and just can’t agree on something? Is he upset that you don’t listen to him, or does he feel that you won’t even consider his opinion? If that’s the case, he’s quiet because he is feeling disrespected.

The good news is that most of the time, a man is quiet because it is relaxing. He doesn’t have dozens of feelings and thoughts racing through his head at any given moment (like you do). In his mind, he’s either extremely focused, or his mind is in the park.

Here’s Your Takeaway

If you have been fighting and he’s acting quiet, then you need to work it out. Don’t let resentment build. Most of the time, he’s simply acting like a guy.

Make that one decision now that will change your life forever.

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About The Author – Bob Grant, L.P.C.

Bob Grant is a Clinically Trained Relationship Expert who’s been working with women for over since 1997. He helps women create successful, satisfying, and fulfilling love relationships by simply understanding men. Click here to learn more about Bob.
Bob Grant, L.P.C.

Information found on this website is not a substitute for personalized help from a licensed professional.