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Be Irresistible

6 Things Men Can’t Resist in A Woman: What Men Find Irresistible

November 8, 2021
by Bob Grant, L.P.C.
Men often can’t describe what has such power over them and makes women totally irresistible. Additionally, a man may not have the ability to pinpoint exactly what it is about a woman that he finds sexy – he just knows what’s sexy when he sees it.  Worst of all, one man’s opinion usually does not represent the opinion of the majority of men – one man may be fixated on breasts, another might be a leg man, and another might have a foot fetish, and so on.
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Four SIMPLE yet often overlooked features that the majority of men find irresistible in a woman are as follows:

  1. Your Smile
  2. Approachability
  3. Laughter
  4. Ability to be at Ease

Let’s dive into the first. When we’re done, we’ll explore two bonus attributes.

1. Your Smile

Believe it or not, one of the top things that a man finds sexy in a woman is something that’s well within your reach. And that is your smile.

A university study was conducted a few years ago, wherein the main objective was to find out exactly what men meant when they described women as “cute” or “attractive.”

Was it that she was tall, shapely, had long hair, long legs, full lips, or a particular look? They interviewed hundreds of male students, and they found a common ingredient. A woman who smiles was always deemed considerably more attractive. Smiling tells a man that a woman is pleased with him, or that she genuinely likes men – and that attitude is very enticing to a man.

In addition, a woman who smiles makes it easier for a man to approach her by conveying an attitude of confidence, warmth, and playfulness. Since many women are fearful of giving men the wrong impression, they frequently guard their smiles. While this approach is safer, it inadvertently sends the wrong message that she is overly cautious because she was hurt before. If she only knew that smiling is one of the things men can’t resist.

In addition, smiling is a sign of acceptance. Men often need some signal that it is safe to approach a woman before they’re willing to risk introducing themselves (unless they are intoxicated). If you find men aren’t approaching you, my first question to you would be, “How often are you smiling?”

2. Approachability

When it comes to attracting men, you must appear approachable.

I know; this is not always easy.

You must learn to achieve a delicate balance, particularly if you want to attract the right kind of man. If you appear too approachable, you’ll attract opportunistic men who have all the wrong motives — and you’ll turn off the more desirable men who prefer a more discriminating woman. 

A man wants to know that he can comfortably initiate a conversation with you without becoming unduly intimidated and without getting sweaty palms — and know that you’ll be receptive to him. But he also wants the reassurance that you’re not equally receptive to every man that comes around.

Approachability, as a factor of sex appeal, includes your attitude and aura and your look. Women who appear as though they went to great lengths to look flawless – i.e., they have a professionally carefully arranged hairstyle, expertly done make-up, perfectly manicured nails, fancy jewelry, and obviously expensive attire, screams “Untouchable” or “High Maintenance” – or worst of all, “Do Not Disturb” — to a man.

Therefore, you now know why supermodels, movie stars, and some of the world’s most gorgeous women often find themselves without dates or male suitors. They look intimidating, not inviting.

Contrary to what the fashion magazines say, ease up on the flawlessness factor and look more down-to-earth and accessible. A man likes touchable hair that he can run his hands through and appreciates a woman who doesn’t mind getting her hair out of place now and then.

He wants lips he can kiss spontaneously without running the risk of the woman saying, “Don’t kiss me — I just put on my lipstick” – or kissing her and smearing messy lip product all over her face and his. They prefer women who won’t have a heart attack if someone accidentally spills a little wine on their blouse or if they need to sit in the front row at the movies because the theater is too crowded.

In other words, a man generally finds it a turn-off if a woman is uptight and acts like a “diva.” Instead, he finds alluring the woman who is “real,” doesn’t take herself way too seriously, can laugh at mishaps that come along, and can gracefully make the best of any situation without making anyone feel offended or inadequate. Some celebrity examples that embody this kind of sex appeal are Julia Roberts and Cameron Diaz.

3. Laughter

Men always want to know that they can make a woman happy. Therefore, a woman who laughs easily (but not excessively) is often irresistible to a man. When a woman indicates that a man makes her happy, the man begins to feel confident, becomes more interested, and wants to please her even more. If he senses that he can’t make her happy, he moves on.

A woman’s laughter is like music to a man’s ears. As the saying goes, “Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” This is certainly true for both men and women. While the majority of men find physical appearance important in their choice of a mate, they tend to be even more attracted to women who are emotionally stable, fun to be around, and supportive. 

It’s a bit like a vicious circle (or should I say a good-natured process.). Women love to laugh, and men want to be the ones to make them laugh or to provide the climate for laughter. When a man causes a woman to laugh, the woman’s laughter gives the man a sense of gratification, strokes his ego, and makes him feel that he can make her happy. That makes for an emotionally charged sexual cocktail and makes the woman appear irresistible to a man.

4. Ability to Be at Ease

This quality always magnetizes a man to a woman — even if she isn’t the most beautiful, the one with the sexiest body, the smartest – and even if she isn’t his type. The late Allen Loy McGinnis stated that social scientists have discovered that while looks, money, power, and prestige are all important in attracting and maintaining a mate, extensive research has shown that none rate as high as the ability to be at ease. The ability to be at ease and act comfortable with yourself in the presence of the opposite sex is irresistible.

Now, this is easy with men you’re not interested in. It becomes much harder to do it with someone you find attractive. Most women think acting “stand-offish” makes them look confident and more of a challenge. Sadly, that actually makes you look guarded and insecure or the other extreme – a W-I-T-C-H.

But there is a way to have this quality effortlessly. It’s like a magical perfume to a man, and you can have it. When you learn this quality, you’ll experience what I call the Campfire Effect. Just like a warm and cozy fire, you’ll find men approaching you…for no apparent reason.

  • Wanting your phone number…
  • Wanting to just talk to you…

Others would call this quality confidence, but it goes beyond confidence. It comes from within you, but it doesn’t require you to change who you are. In fact, once you let it out, you’ll be shocked at how men will start treating you. That’s what happened to Anna.

41 years old and recently divorced with 3 small children, she thought any chance for love had surely passed her by. See how just 9 months later, she had men begging her for her phone number. 

Let’s Summarize What We’ve Covered

If you’re like most people, you probably know at least one woman who isn’t particularly pretty or who doesn’t have a sexy body, but she always seems to attract the most men in any social setting. Men are drawn to her, can’t take their eyes off her — and when they talk to other men about her, they say they can’t quite seem to put a finger on what it is that accounts for her immense sex appeal. 

Wouldn’t you want to be THAT kind of woman? Wouldn’t you want to feel what it’s like to be the center of men’s attention wherever you go or just have the undivided attention of your husband or boyfriend? There are secrets I know that can unlock the heart of a man – bring a man to his knees and make him beg you to be his and his alone. 

If you were to ask a man for his opinion on what’s irresistible to men, first of all, he may or may not give you an honest answer. His answer will depend on several factors, such as whether he thinks his answer will please you, whether he wants to share information with you and so you can exercise power over him, or a host of other factors.

Additional Qualities You Do Not Want to Ignore

In addition to what we have covered above, let’s look at two qualities we have not touched on yet that a man finds irresistible.

5. A Woman Who Listens Instead of Dominating the Conversation

Women are generally perceived as rarely really listening to men, at least not beyond a few minutes.

Most of the time, a few minutes is all men really need. But since most men hate rejection, it is easier for them to keep conversations superficial. Men expect most women to want to talk rather than be willing to listen.

If a man happens to meet a woman who listens with her eyes (looks at him while he’s talking) as well as her ears, they are intrigued. If she continues to listen and not take over the conversation, she’s the kind of woman that men can’t resist and want to spend more time getting to know her better. In fact, this is one of the best things you can do on a first date.

6. A Woman Who Dresses Feminine 

Everyone knows that men are visual. However, women often forget just how helpless men are to what they see. The proper visual stimulation can hypnotize any man. Unfortunately, women hear this and often become fearful. They mistakenly believe that men only notice perfect women.

Forget perfect! Despite what you read in magazines, men don’t expect a woman to be perfect. If you want to be noticed by men, think of colors and dresses which highlight your curves. Don’t dress to impress your girlfriends, but rather dress like you understand what guys like. Men basically want any woman who has that adorable quality that men can’t resist. It isn’t that men don’t find women attractive in pants or when they are dressed comfortably – they just don’t notice them as easily. It doesn’t catch their eye like sparkly earrings, pretty colors, or flowing dresses and long hair does.

Conversely, a powerfully dressed woman (think lots of red) makes most men think of sex or not notice her at all. She may have a soft side, but if men can’t see it, they often don’t know it exists. The more feminine (softer) a woman dresses, the more men she will attract. Remember what we said in our 2nd feature – Approachability, as a factor of sex appeal, includes your attitude and aura and your look. Women who appear as though they went to great lengths to look flawless – i.e., they have a professionally carefully arranged hairstyle, expertly done make-up, perfectly manicured nails, fancy jewelry, and obviously expensive attire, screams “Untouchable” or “High Maintenance” – or worst of all, “Do Not Disturb” — to a man.

Wrapping Up

We’ve explored the following six ways you become irresistible to men.

  1. Your Smile
  2. Approachability
  3. Laughter
  4. Ability to be at Ease
  5. A Listening Woman
  6. A Woman Who Dresses Feminine

As you reflect on this article, think about one of these six areas. Which is one you can focus on improving over the next few weeks?

If you need additional ideas and guidance, check out our free guide for becoming irresistible to men. Or, explore our other resources on becoming an irresistible woman here.

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About The Author – Bob Grant, L.P.C.

Bob Grant is a Clinically Trained Relationship Expert who’s been working with women for over since 1997. He helps women create successful, satisfying, and fulfilling love relationships by simply understanding men. Click here to learn more about Bob.
Bob Grant, L.P.C.