The biggest complaint that I hear from many women is that they hate that they wasted time with a man. It could be that they dated a man for almost a year and they soon realize that he isn’t ready for a commitment or he’s just not the one.
I definitely know how frustrating this can be when you’ve had someone waste your time however; it is not entirely the man’s fault. You are to blame as well.
Now before you start jumping down my throat just hear me out.
Did you properly get to know him to ensure that he wanted to be in a committed relationship or did you assume?
Assuming and lack of communication is the number one reason that you may have gotten your time wasted. So how can you prevent this from happening in the future?
The first step is to know exactly what you want. This is the first process that I take all of my private clients through. It is important for you to have a clear vision of where you want to go in your love life. If you don’t then it is easy for you to hook up with the first man who shows you any kind of attention or desires to be in a relationship.
Also, when you have a clear vision of what you want in life it becomes easier for you to weave out the good men from the bad men. For example, if your vision includes that you want to be a wife, a mother, and have peace and harmony in your home then you would be looking for a man who fits into this vision.
So when you’re on a date then some questions you may ask are:
What are your thoughts about marriage?
Have you ever been married before?
If you’ve been married, what is the reason that your marriage ended? (Please note that you may not want to date a guy who’s been married 4 times. He may be the problem and hasn’t fixed himself yet. )
Next, is to focus on getting to know a man to see if you both share the same relationship goals. If you’re looking to be married or to be in a serious committed relationship then be sure that you’re having conversations about the type of love life you want.
For example, if you want to be married and have children then discuss those topics. If you meet a man via online dating and he shares with you that he doesn’t want children and he’s not looking to settle down then…..RUN!!! He’s already expressed to you what he wants. I don’t care how handsome he is don’t waste your time waiting for him to change his mind.
Remember that you pick who you spend your time with and you are equally responsible. So as you move forward in your love life be sure that you’re asking the right questions and making wise decisions.
Erica Johnson is a wife, mother, and a dating and relationship coach. She is passionate about helping single women overcome their biggest obstacles so that they can have a healthy love life. She provides straight to the point advice on how to switch up your approach to dating, where to meet men, and how to build healthy relationships with men.